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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 872
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Sorry i'm a bit late but i do not have to work any more now not until next Monday! Good job too - ive got a feelin' its goin to be one helluva hangover.....
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 585
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yes I did let the fire-men go Sadly thought there families may be missing them and it is Christmas the attic is ok now I am so looking forward to our big night out I am getting ready now but looking out of the window it is still snowing well that has not stopped me before I have waxed my ski's as well as my eye brows and legs so every-thing should be smooth for me to slide down the pole hope you have oiled your chains Jean I hated the way the rust rolled down your neck last time see you all at 7 Amanda I have a spard tray you can have Mary L
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Darn that Doreen! Should have kept quiet! Only a few hours to go: I hope that Jean is well enough to come and that she is not sporting chains and mohicans! That was too, too kind of you letting the fireman go Mary! Now how will you get to Edinburgh if the roads are bad? That fire engine would have come in handy if when we got to the Bowling club,Willie and the haggi were hiding from us. I hope that we have a standby plan because it is not looking good for crossing the border, even on our broomsticks! That goes for Mary in Wales as well especially now that she doesn't have the firemen. Lizzie, as this is your first time, we could consider letting you make the alternative plan?
Do not outshine me Doreen: it gets a bit much sometimes! Especially as I am down to kiwis and grapefruits!
Getting ready now!!!!!
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Mary the fireman that live round the corner from me are all single and have no plans for tonight other than coming with us to Cuba Eleanor you're thinking Carmen Miranda, my outfit will be coconut shells, and palm leaves as I don't want to give anyone on the way a heart attack wearing just XXL tassels and super XXXXL thong (I best cover up a bit!). Of course for the journey I will also be wearing my new Cruella Deville coat and black patent high heeled thigh boots  . I've had my hair done too, lovely long blond extensions........, Girls I hope you don't mind but I've invited along Tinkerbell along, I'm thinking we could use her magic dust to help Mary out collecting the Haggi and Willie. We can't risk Jean embarrassing us, one of you girls will have to check she doesn't leave the house wearing Dr Martin boots, a green mohican and those awful rusty chains As for the drink, well it's all sorted and there's no worries there. Bearing in mind I have to swing by the New Forest to pick up Amanda I need to know what time we're meeting? Oh yes who's bringing the pole? If there's going to be anyone out shinning Doreen and Eleanor watch this space  It's going to be meeeee!!!!!!
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,006 Location: Timperley
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Lylie sends her apologies for tonight. I've just been chatting to her. Her thong is frozen solid on the line, as are her tassels, and the peanuts she mistakenly put in her bra (instead of the bird table?!) just won't come out. As she doesn't have another suitable outfit, she wont be joining us!!
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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Do keep up Barbara, Mary's already checked that the pole is in situ and well oiled. I couldn't catch Jean before she left so I'm afraid she will be embarrassing us again with the mohican, chains and doc martins.
Don't worry Eleanor, I'll lend you some grapes for your outfit. What happened to the peaches and pineapples?
Going to get into my champagne bath now to get in the mood. I'm running a bit late but will catch you up.
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,582 Location: Oxfordshire
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JUST popped open the champagne....ooooh it's bubbly, cold and delicious...
I am in a special surprise outfit....and am looking forward to seeing you Barbara when you pick me up...
I have a new sledge to attach my stash of champagne on..
See you SOON!
A
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sorry I am late I had a champers bath too but drank most of it sorry Jean was not told not to wear the chains and the mohican hair but she will get away with it I am going to wear my silk sheets (yes you did hear right silk sheets) as a toga I have laural leaves for my head dress I have a very big bump on my nose to get into character tonight Matthew I am going to be Ceser dident expect that did you? I will be with you by 10-30 Mary L
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Tonight, Matthew, the men in white coats are coming to take her away!
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will be in the same hospital as you Jean
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Rank: Advanced Member  Groups: Registered
Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,582 Location: Oxfordshire
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WHAT A NIGHT!
BUT Mark was not impressed when the (5) firemen brought Mary, Eleanor and Julie home with me......
I tried to exlplain it was becasue of our wheaties getting overheated but he didn't buy it!
ooooops,
A
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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How did Kathleen manage to smuggle that snake into the club?
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Purlease....don't start that snake stuff again, Doreen. My belt became loose during the skirmish in the Chelsea VIP lounge and I tied the darned snake around me in mistake for my belt. Eleanor was using to belt to pull poor Roman Abramovitch around the room. Amanda is facing a HUGE bill after attempting to swing from the fluorescent light fitting over the band - I DID say it wouldn't support her, but she pressed on regardless and my, oh my, that man was more than a little put out at having to pull her out of his big drum. I think the biggest mistake of all was letting Jenni play the harp - when she caught her foot in it and started to walk towards the door pulling it behind, she smashed into 5 tables, pulled the bar down and thought it was funny?! I mean - whatever next. The sight of the rest of you lying on the floor under the dripping bottles is one I will long remember. There was a report of it in the Daily Mail yesterday - don't know if you saw it? Quite disgraceful. Mary is due to be released in the morning. Barbara is due to be sentenced on Monday.
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So Barbara is being sentenced, have we lost our protector? I didn't see the Daily Mail, for some reason the print was all blurred, I've complained to them about that. Jenni was fantastic on the harp, getting us those free drinks. The last time I saw Kathleen and Eleanor, they were making a snowman and looking for a carrot.
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We found it! It was in Tesco express's window.  I didn't know that kathleen could run so fast! All Kathleen went on about all night was that darned snake!  Thank goodness for Jenni as she had a mobile phone in her boots so was able to phone Jean, the only one of us to make it home to her own bed (I think  ) to check up on that snake. Had anyone else realised that she was so friendly with Boris? There she was bold as brass, with the snake draped around her neck, riding in his fancy carriage during the New Year day parade yesterday. Mary, Julie and I were waiting for Macdonalds to open as she rode by waving her hand like the queen! We thought it best to exit Amanda's before Mark got out of bed as Mary and Julie polished off the expensive bottle of champers he got from his boss for Christmas (Amanda and I had the other as there was no point in just leaving one!) I didn't know that Julie was a climber? When she ended up atop the Christmas tree last week, I thought that it was a drunk...., pardon, it was an error of judgement but, lo and behold, up Nelson's column she went after Barbara handed round the third lot of drinks while we were eating doughnuts in Trafalger Square. As for Barbara! What about her organisation skills! Thought we were going to Cuba via Edinburgh? And as for the drinks! Pieces of fruit with our drinks? My head gear had no fruit left on it by the Bells! As for Doreen, she claimed to be Carmen Miranda because she had a head full of grapes! What did Lizzie look like with that hat! Where did she get it? What was the point of wearing a balaclava with a mini skirt and stillettos? Very poor taste, not like Mary who was suitable attired in her silk sheets! Has anyone heard from Kathleen? I did see her underneath the bar after the slight mishap with the harp but after that, well I don't know? Gosh girls, what ever happened to the rest of you? Is Barbara OK? She isn't used to baudy behaviour Doreen! I'll blame you if she won't come out with us again! Next night out is for my retirement girls! Sign up now for a refined evening of em.............opera!!!! Eleanor x
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 1,582 Location: Oxfordshire
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Barbara is out tonight....we had to bribe a policeman from next door to help get her released, phew.
I am sorry about the swinging....I was just excited, sorry frightened, when I noticed that snake again. Honestly how did it get there?
Oh no worries Eleanor about the champers..plenty more for your retirement do, but opera? Which one, Carmen??? I'm up for that! But can we take champers in with us, please? I thought we could stop off at an exclusive club afterwards which stays open all night.
Can't wait! Will have to drop some of my diazepam into Mark's freshly ground coffee before we go out so he won't notice I'm gone!
Love, A
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Joined: 12/4/2009 Posts: 1,524 Location: W. Yorkshire
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This is priceless-thank you for cheering me up! YES I'VE CHANGED, PAIN DOES THAT TO PEOPLE.
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Joined: 12/3/2009 Posts: 3,157 Location: Huddersfield
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